My. 'Contract' with Boredom...

I checked out Ram Gopal Varma's 'NEW' movie, 'Contract' the other day. My uncle convinced me to come to watch that movie...Boy does he convince well! I didn't expect anything new from that movie, cos everyone knows RGV's formula for a movie:
A really pissed off protagonist, who does not shave his beard
+
A 3 BHK apartment full of Guns, bullets, packets of fake blood
+
Multiple antagonists, who are against each other
+
a sultry chick, who...is...just...there...and does...NOTHING...except drink beer...and wear makeup
+
BANG! BANG!...Teri Maa ki...^%*@)#(@^$*@...BANG! BANG!!
+
A hopeless item number with the female trying even more hopelessly to imitate a famous vamp
+
Cops
+
Underworld

With these thoughts on my mind, apart from some leftover sleep, I trudged to the theatre with my uncle. The movie started out pretty decently...Ummm...it was probably my leftover sleep catching up to me that was making me hallucinate. The actor...a new guy..."RGV's new find" performed well with his co-star...by which, I mean his gun.
After 2 hours of guns/blood/profanities, the scene that I was waiting for, finally started, the credits. I eagerly trampled on the already eager viewers, who wanted to rush out, to rush out myself, partly because I wanted to use the loo. Few of the guys who actually enjoyed the movie, were already imagining themselves as the hero.

It was a fine day in the end...as I got to complete some of my sleep, in the theatre.

Vida

Vida lene ki baat hui, toh yeh sun hi lijeeye
Hamare jaane se pehle, dil ki baat keh to dijeeye
Kaun jaane kal naseeb kaunse mod par le jaaye
Is aakhri pal me to mere dil ko sukoon de hi dijeeye

Lamhe...

Lamhe beet jaaye aaj
Phir bhi tujhe na bhool paayenge
Lamhe beet jaaye aaj
Phir bhi tujhe na bhool paayenge
Tu bas ek baar pyaar se dekhle,
Lamhe kya cheez hai...Hum saari zindagi isi ek pal ke saath jee jaayenge

I need a vacation...

Yesterday, I happened to catch an English movie, The Holiday, *ing Jude Law, Jack Black, Cameron Diaz & Kate Winslet. My dear friend Hrishikesh suggested this movie, complimenting it's storyline, characters etc. Mind you, the movie was on a PC, at my office, thereby giving me no other option. I now sincerely thank him for having suggested that film.
As the movie started, I began to feel bored, owing to the fact that no action was expected, and Kate' s character was doing something close to a prologue, which to me, felt dreary. The basic gist of the movie is that the 2 protagonists, Cameron, a rich and successful movie trailer maker living in L.A., and Kate, a woman working for a Publication house in Surrey, England are screwed up big time w.r.t. their love life. Both exchange their homes for a period of 2 weeks as a part of a home exchange during Christmas. It is during this period where they both find true love and happiness.
As the movie progressed, I felt like concentrating more on Kate's character, to which, I was starting to relate. As I am not good in outlining a character's part in a movie, I took the liberty of flicking it from Wikipedia: After 3 years of an on-again off-again relationship, Iris (Kate) is still in love with Jasper Bloom, her co-worker at a London publishing house, despite his infidelity and exploitation of her feelings. However, during her company's Christmas party, Jasper announces that he is now engaged to Sarah Smith-Alcott, the woman with whom he cheated on Iris, and Iris is crushed. Iris then exchanges homes with Amanda (Cameron) and finds love in Jack Black's character, Miles. Now, one would ask how is this relationship possible (reference to mine and Iris's life)? Well, let me tell you something which is a known fact all over the world. Many people hate their jobs, but are still in it for the money. There is zero satisfaction, tons of friction between co-workers, unwanted meetings to attend, but one still struggles through it, mumbling profanities under their breath to satisfy themselves. I am one of those 'many'. Iris, even though she knew that the relationship was a goner, craved for it, respected it, loved it. Similarly, I am trying to find a reason to stay in the job that I am currently in, even though I know that I am not happy being it in it. Theoretically, the work is great (similar to Iris' relationship), the only difference in practicality being, that it is not.
Iris inwardly knows that she can get nothing more from her failed relationship, and that she should be moving on, yet, she clings on to some unknown string of hope. I have been swinging from one string to another, much like Tarzan!
Iris finds a whole new life in L.A., thereby opening new doors of relations, one of which has Miles standing at the other end. So I ask myself, should I be getting that vacation? Should I...exchange jobs at this point, even though I am not through with my educational course that I am pursuing (funded by my organization, for which, I am full of gratitude). At one point of the movie, I guessed that Miles is going to be Iris's love. I was really interested in the way in which she approached this, for I wanted to take some pointers...(silly na?) When Jasper came back to her with some romantic crap, she finally understands that she is OUT of that relationship...and I quote from F.R.I.E.N.D.S: She....is over him. So, I set to imagine: What is it that needs to tell me, that I am to be out of here? Is is a big fight, or an emotional blackout or maybe...the title of the movie, a holiday?
Just the right time to get this thought! I am going on a holiday during the first week of June, to get away from 'Jasper' (Cool way to name your job eh?) and to rethink my priorities and well, to see many more movies, that do not make me write such blogs ;-)
By the way...the movie was a good one...It is a happy ending, with Iris celebrating New Year with Miles, and Jasper...out somewhere...ruing... Catch the movie whenever possible...Okay then...time for me to pack my bags and head for that holiday...Ciao!

A stroll through the Park..

After a long day's work, to my home I came
My life, no different, all the more same
I cleansed myself, my face and hand
Getting rid of the day's dust and sand
I glimpsed, for a minute, outside my window
My eyes caught the Rainbow, resting on the meadow
I said to myself, "Is it too late, for a stroll in the park?"
"Or has the sun deceived me...by putting my world into the dark..."

On the green grass, I walked, with thoughts on my mind,

The sun slowly creeping away, making the surrounding blind

The moon sliding quietly, over the horizon,

Their combined light, giving the earth a glisten

It was then, that I noticed her,

With hair of the color of amber

And a face, completely somber
She was sitting by the side of the lake

My curiosity suddenly became awake

With steady steps I walked up to her

With a bit of apprehension, and a hint of fear

Tears streaked her elegant face,
Which she wiped, with a beautiful grace
Her eyes asked thousands of questions
For which, I had no answers, to mention
I asked her for her name
But a response, never came
The grace vanished, the beauty gone,
On her angelic face, was a new look born...

Her eyes widened, her lips parted,
With a look of fear, she then darted
I ran after her, with my boggled mind
Amidst the bushes, her, I tried to find
In the wild darkness, she had vanished
With her pulchritude on my thoughts, I trudged home

With the sun shining bright, I woke
With heavy footsteps, I left my oak
The faceless girl, who gave me thoughts so many,
I decided, to name her Anne
Who she was, where she went
I did not know, but so much it meant
It has been ten years since I last saw her
I still keep looking for her, down by the river

My dear Anne, the night I set my eyes on you
My love was there, like the morning's dew
I pray to the Lord, day and night
To show the path, to show the light
Find her for me, I say to him
Find her for me, I pray to him...

Reflections...

When I look into the mirror, I see a different person
For the image that I see, is there a specific reason?
Who is the person on the other side?
Who laughs at me, with a grin so wide...
When I ask him, "Do I know you?"
He asks back, "Have you no clue?"
There is a faint recognition, I may say,
"I have seen him somewhere...some place....some day",

When I look into the mirror, I see a different person
He seems like somebody's father, somebody's son
I try to place him in my mind
I ask myself, "Why is he so hard to find?"
I swim across rivers of thoughts,
Of dreams, of visions that my life has brought
When I cannot find him, I fret
Thinking...Why is this so hard to get?

When I look into the mirror, I see a different person
Recognition strikes me... like slow poison
I shudder to think, "Could this be him?"
He then smiles, thus taking my fears to the brim
I turn to the almighty for an answer
All I get is Lightning and Thunder

When I look into the mirror, I see myself 25 years from now
I then sit to think...this is possible...how?
But then I realize the lord's ways
When he plays, he plays
I thank him though for this sight
For it throws on my future, some light
I wonder if I can make changes as a prevention
Before what I see in front of me, becomes my actual reflection.

Hey...Whats your 'Rate'?

For any lay man, this would sound as if a hooker is being propositioned. But if any thought is put on this from the perspective of a software professional, a whole new concept is thrown at you. One can describe it as a battle of patience, perseverance and wit to emerge victorious in the struggle between Professionals and the Management of multi national corporations...which is in one dreadful word, called, Appraisals. The ultimate reward being a very high rating, and a very good salary increase. The inanity of this complete fracas is that the professional loses his/her true abilities and has to learn just one skill. The skill of sucking up to your peers (Well this is my view on this, I have to say that some may have a different opinion).

When it comes to IT bigwigs, appraisal periods are a time to portray their big hearts. Their willingness to give thousands as incentives. But we know better, don't we? Many freshers look at appraisals as a benchmark to home in on their choices of their first jobs. So companies use appraisals as baits for freshers, although its kind of ironic that experienced staff are being left in the lurch.

An army is divided broadly into Infantry, Cavalry and the heavy Bombers. In a similar fashion, the "Appraisee" side is divided into, "I-don't-care-a-tiny-rats-ass-on-this-Appraisal", "Oh-lord-help-me-salvage-victory-from-this-Apocalypse", "If-these-people-screw-up-my-career-I-will-not-leave-them" & "What-in-the-world-is-an-Appraisal". I used to belong to the second group. The thought of going to the Appraisal Meeting, aptly entitled, "Feedback Session", gave me the creeps!

I vividly remember my first Appraisal session where my confirmation would take place. The trepidation amongst all first-timers was evident with plenty of emails being sent across. "Have you talked to people who have undergone this earlier?" is one of the usual question that is put forth. Once that phase is covered, a giant wakes up. This giant goes by the name, SAF or Self Appraisal Form. Putting it plainly, the SAF is a dress with which you need to cover your naked talent. Now, anybody can cover talent. But here is where the ability to make the complete package "dazzle" comes into the picture. The trick here is to make the appraiser feel that this person is different, no matter how teeny-tiny are you, with respect to your abilities. Picture Jennifer Aniston in a nine yard saree...and in a sexy black dress with stilettos and you will feel the difference (For my female readers, Tom Cruise, in a kurta-pyjama and in the Top Gun outfit must do the trick).

I remember the time I took to worry about the SAF and the time taken to fill it. 10 days to worry, and 10 minutes to fill and submit it. I then realised that this whole sham is just a stage show. the actual screenplay is long done with details for your salary increase, designation already finalized. Cos after all the emails, scrutiny in filling out the SAF & carefully answering all questions put forward in the Feedback session, all I got was a "GOOD" and an increase of 50%. Not to mention about the anxiety in waiting for the Appraisal Letter, that took an eternity to come. That was the time when I shifted to group 1.

After the dust settled on this whole "Process", I thought to myself, how would these people feel after getting their letters? Will they be depressed? Will they show a drop in their talent? Or...Will they quit (the best!)? As a year's Appraisal period comes to an end, the next cycle has begun, with people again scrambling to get their SAFs filled, queries resolved and much more, in another daring attempt to challenge the mighty...."MANAGEMENT"!!! Hey...gotta go..just received an email from a first-timer with a question.."What do they do Feedback Session?" I am going to enjoy replying to this...See ya!!